Reflections and illusions

I've been making some life changes when it comes to nutrition and exercise so naturally my thoughts are going to lean in that direction. I was reading a devotional this morning and it brought to mind something I had learned recently. Bear with me. 

In the past whenever I experienced a food craving, I would reach for the food in which I was craving. Sounds logical, right? Well I have learned recently, that it was actually water my body was craving. I had misinterpreted it. When I drink the water instead, my craving is satisfied and I am held over until the appropriate meal or snack time. 

So here's what I'm getting at...

The devotion I was reading was a part of a seven day devotional written by Mike Donehey of Tenth Avenue North. He says, "This one thought changed everything. That every beautiful thing I get enamored by is just a reflection of the One who made it. Any beauty I am dazzled by or promise I'm lured by, it's always Him my soul is hungry for. And when I see that, all other temptations lose their power. To understand all that I love is merely a mirror pointing me upward frees me to let those things go. I don't have to have them, I have to have the One Who made them. And the pleasure and reward His presence offers far surpasses..."

All this time I was focusing on what my heart wanted. For me, I've always struggled on the relationship front. Embarrassed to admit this, but I even became angry when a relationship fell through before it ever took off. I remember a moment filled with pure grief and tears when talking to my mother about it. She said what everyone always says..."it just wasn't God's will." 

I remember the anger I felt when hearing those words. I was tired of it. I'd heard it all my life. I didn't understand why all these other people could be in and out of relationships, go through heart break, get over it and start over again. But then God would never let me get to the starting line. 

I remember shouting on the phone, "I just wish He would let me make a mistake!" How foolish is that?

God was guarding me, protecting me and I wanted nothing to do with it. I believed whole-heartedly that a relationship could satisfy me. The whole time God was quietly saying, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. (John 6:35 NLT)

Those desires, the things we crave so fiercely, are mere reflections of what our soul is craving. It's not about the relationship. It's not about the new car or beautiful house. It's not about a burgeoning business or making your first million. That's all an illusion. You're really craving, needing  the One who created it all. 

This Overflow Devo by Tenth Avenue North can be found on the YouVersion Bible App. 

embrace your weaknesses

If I wanted to boast, I would be no fool in doing so, because I would be telling the truth. But I won’t do it, because I don’t want anyone to give me credit beyond what they can see in my life or hear in my message, even though I have received such wonderful revelations from God. So to keep me from becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud. Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:6-10 NLT)

Paul, with great reason, struggled with pride. With an ever growing fan base, I could see it being an easy thing to struggle with. I, on the other hand, struggle with insecurities. 

In this passage, Paul is saying God has given his this "thorn in his side," this "handicap" to keep him grounded. It actually translates to an angel of Satan or demon, but that's another post. 

Pride pushes God out of the picture. He is no longer needed because it is now all about you. In the same way, insecurity pushes God out too. It is saying God is not capable of working through you. This passage is telling us to embrace our weaknesses because through them God is able to accomplish His work in you. 

God says, "My grace is enough; it's all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness." (MSG)

Humility is that place in between pride and insecurity. It's where you recognize God's sovereignty, power, and authority. Where you give over control and let Him complete His perfect work. 

I love how Paul's words are phrased in The Message: "Now I take my limitations that cut me down to size--abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become."

His goodness

I haven't written in awhile. Partly because I've been focusing on my book and at the end of the day I am just out of words. But suddenly, like a fresh renewal I find myself bursting with thoughts and emotions that I can't contain. Must. Write. 

It's been a crazy whirlwind this year and I must confess, I was defeated. I lost hope. I lost vision. I lost desire to serve. The flame within me had flickered and died. I was so focused on what I was lacking, so consumed by the injustice surrounding me that I lost sight of anything good. 

Well as we sang at church this morning, I focused in on the words of a song I had sung so many times. Only today I grasped onto it and claimed it. 

"I will remain confident in this; I will see the goodness of The Lord."

I decided in that moment enough is enough. I WILL see His goodness! It's time to shake free of the negativity and grab onto the promises of God. 

The speaker at church, Joe Boyd, said sonething that really resonated with me. He said we have to let go of our brokenness in order to reach out and grab hold of what God is offering. 

The speaker asked "what is it that you are holding onto?" For me, it was past failures, insecurities, and basically really stupid stuff. Once I realized that, I felt foolish. God has something more for me, something bigger and better than I can even imagine. He's offering it to me, but my hands are full of past mistakes and regrets. 

I'm choosing to let go. I'm choosing to see His goodness, to lay claim to His promises. 

So...what are YOU holding onto? I can guarantee He has something better.