a mere touch

I've been rummaging through the pictures from my trip to Italy and Israel this past year, reliving all the things I had seen and experienced. I feel this strong pull to return...to learn more, to see more. One of the places that really stood out to me was Capernaum. There we were at the Sea of Galilee where Jesus' ministry began. This is what remains of the synagogue.

The foundation, the black stone in the first picture, is the original foundation. My group sat under the trees next to the synagogue and recounted the story of the woman who reached out and touched the hem of His garment.

"Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak. She said to herself, 'If I only touch His cloak, I will be healed.' Jesus turned and saw her. 'Take heart, daughter,' He said, 'your faith has healed you.' And the woman was healed from that moment." Mt. 9:20-22 NIV

This week, the band is learning a new song to sing this weekend. It's lyrics immediately transported me back to that spot underneath the trees in Capernaum where I sat and shed tears craving the faith this woman had possessed. Just one touch is all we need.

In Mt. 9 you find that Jesus was on His way to bringing a dead child back to life. There was a crowd surrounding Him, all waiting for this huge miracle to happen. This woman didn't want to interrupt Him. She knew that the mere brush of His garment would be powerful enough to cleanse her. To cure her.

That's the kind of faith we should all yearn to have. To reach out knowing that He will provide. To step out knowing He will heal. Knowing He will change your life forever, and all you need is just one touch.

friends

I don't find it purely coincidental when something keeps appearing throughout my week. It's God. He'll bring something to my attention on Sunday, then I'll read it again on Tuesday. Or someone will bring it up on Thursday. I absolutely love it, well...most of the time anyways. 


This past Sunday, Pastor spoke about being a part of a team, having the right people surrounding you--two are better than one. Then this week my Bible study was on the topic of sin and where it begins. There was a statement made that said, "All rebellion begins with isolation."


I knew God was trying to tell me something. I began to think back to the times I was far from God and realized each time, one thing was consistent....I had isolated myself. 


Personally, when I am alone, my thoughts get the best of me. I begin to doubt myself, and my insecurities flare. I begin to feel lonely. Sometimes I get upset that no one's around, never mind that I pushed them away. It's inevitable that I become vulnerable and weak. That's when Satan attacks. 


You need people in your lives. People that hold you accountable. People that encourage and lift you up. My father always told me you need two types of friends: those who encourage you and those that you encourage.


If you are constantly pouring your life into the lives of others, you will quickly get burned out. If you are constantly sucking all the encouragement out of others for your own benefit, you will quickly have no friends. And if you have no friends, then you need to evaluate why. There needs to be a balance. 


Beth Moore says, "I want people in my life who love me enough to offend me if necessary and help me not to fall." And I believe you also need to be that kind of person for others as well. 


I suggest you take an inventory on those around you, and see which category they fit into. Do they encourage you or do you encourage them? Are both sides accounted for? Or have you isolated yourself and become vulnerable?

comfort level

I've still been dwelling a lot on the whole concept of change. There have been many, many changes in my life and the lives of my family members these last couple of years. Jess and I graduated from school, Aaron from high school. My parents left everything in Florida, moved then moved again. Shay made the heartbreaking decision to file for divorce. Jess and Brandon said "I do." I moved from Boston to Boise. Shay and I moved from Boise back to Boston. Now we are all back together again, serving at a church in New Hampshire. Oh, and there will be another major change coming on August 4th-ish...when I become an aunt. Yes, Jess and Brandon are expecting. 


Life is full of change and we must be open to it. Yes, I still think about the days when life seemed so much easier and comfortable. But I realized this week, we aren't called to be comfortable or complacent. That isn't what we are here for. That isn't our purpose. 


For example, I'm not a limelight kinda girl. I'm behind the scenes, or behind the computer. I write. I don't speak publicly or stand center stage. I've always enjoyed singing, and in my family its just what we do. My sisters have these phenomenal power house voices. I could never compete, nor did I want to. So I learned to harmonize. 


Now recently I was given the opportunity to sing with the worship team at church. I've done this before, but always in a small church, never in one the size of the church I am now attending. Scared out of my mind, and way out of my element, I went for it knowing this was what God wanted from me. I had the safety net of my sister on stage and I was not asked to lead, therefore all was good. I finally became comfortable. 


Bad mistake. Never become comfortable. They decided to give Shay a weekend off. I didn't have a safety net. I needed her. I couldn't do it on my own. Then they gave me not one, but two songs. Yikes. Were these people crazy? I practiced and practiced. Then right before the first note came out of my mouth I realized something. 


It doesn't matter. God could use me regardless of my nerves. Regardless of my inability to transform into Carrie Underwood, Beyonce, or Kelly Clarkson. Regardless of any of it. Because it wasn't about me. It never is about me. It's always about Him. I think that's why He's so quick to use those who need Him most. Because you can see that much more of God's power.


In Judges 7, it's the story of Gideon fighting the Midianites. They start with 32,000 men and God says "too many." God continues to weed through the men until finally only 300 remain. They ended up entering the enemy camp armed with only a ram's horn and clay pot. And they won!


God wants you to see where you end and He begins. He wants you to remember it is all about Him. I love that in the process He's still able to use me in spite of all my failings and inabilities. I'll give up some comfort for that any day.